stopjoshdun:

the weirdest thing someone has said to me recently was “you know you’re not supposed to wear the bands shirt to the concert.”
why not? am I supposed to be playing hard to get with the band? like im at the show, they know i like them, its okay

venusinpendeja:

me and all my gay friends trying to sit together

viola-and-chill:

sing us a song you’re the piano man

morthils:

ranger-truth:

sushinfood:

great-tweets:

watch the whole thing, i’m begging you

this is NUTS

Reblogging this again because I found out he’s actually the drummer in an all-mascot metal band called Charamel.

wait a second

justmakeitstop:

proudly-pro-choice:

proudly-pro-choice:

????? This is the guy in my English class that I only contact when I wasn’t in class. It’s too early for this.

If you’ve had some creep send you something worse than this, please let me know.

So he forgot he requested me on Facebook…I messaged his mother.

You know you fucked up when your mom tells someone to call the police about your ridiculous behavior because she tried but she is DONE, you’re supposed to be a man by now.

cephalotodd:

the real reason the symbiotes were interested in earth was cos they found tom hardy’s slutty myspace photos

renniequeer:

renniequeer:

My dad: “So if your pronouns are they and them, how should I refer to you when I brag about you? My daughter? My son?”

Me: “Mom’s just been calling me her kid or her child.”

My dad: “I shall call you…my Eldest Spawn.”

I feel like it’s worth noting that he was wearing a Cthulu t-shirt when this happened.

important PSA about when your car is smoking

theevilblackbunny:

alicatchrist:

mama-green:

like literally smoking from the engine

white and you smell pancakes?
it’s the coolant. panic and pull over, but you’ll live

a slight blue tinge?
it’s the oil. panic and pull over, but you’ll live

grey, looks like fire smoke?
gasoline; the most combustable and dangerous. pull over and leave the vehicle, pray.

sharing because i didn’t know this when my car started smoking white yesterday and i was so afraid for my life.

Reblogging because a dear friend of my Moms with mechanic experience told me the same thing when I got my license.

White or blue, you’ll pull through.

But if it’s gray, get away.

thankgoodnessforme:

cardozzza:

lightnjoynstuff:

oakydokey:

honeygoblin:

Little is known about the origins of this practice, although there is some unfounded speculation that it is loosely derived from or perhaps inspired by ancient Aegean notions about bees’ ability to bridge the natural world with the afterlife.

#me shoving my head into a beehive: yall would not fuckin BELIEVE the day i’ve had

@cardozzza

I love the mental image that tag creates

The bees when you give them the tea:

horreurscopes:

do you ever get into one of those moods where your heart aches and longs for something so deeply but you dont know what and your heart is like a stubborn toddler screaming i want it !!!! please give it to me !!!! And you’re desperately like i don’t know what kind of emotionally fulfilling experience to give you at 3 PM on a Wednesday !!!!!!!!!