*cracks knuckles* i didnt get my medical license revoked for nothing
i like idea of a necromancer that can bring back the dead but doesnt know how to cure the living so has to wait for someone to die before bringing them back
“hey doc do you have any splints I think I fractured my ankle”
everyone in fantasy novels is horny on main for elves and it’s honestly a travesty like why the hell would you want to marry an elf you’ll just spend the rest of your days growing old in the woods with a bunch of immortal bastards whose heads are so far up their asses they think singing week-long ballads is prime entertainment and say shit like “thou” and “beseech” unironically y’all should be hooking up with dwarves who 1. actually know how to throw the fuck down and let loose at a party 2. will literally shower you in diamond dust and gold they mined and crafted with their bare hands and 3. can sling you over their shoulder like a sack of potatoes with their huge muscular arms developed from hours of said mining and crafting. there’s literally no contest.
You start a game of DnD with a blank character sheet. Your DM has them all. You only discover stats and things as they become relevant.
Like, “I rolled 7 on my constitution check” “You get a +2 bonus so that’s a 9.” *Hurriedly marking it down*
Or
“I would like to ask the innkeeper if there is anything weird going on in the area” “Dragonborn are rare in these parts, so she is suspicious at your approach.” “Wait I’m a DRAGONBORN?!?”
It would be absolute chaos but for a one-shot I feel it would be fun. Maybe all the characters have amnesia and they have to figure out what they can do from scratch.
It’s not D&D, exactly, but Alas Vegas is a RPG where the characters dig themselves out of shallow graves at the edge of the city and have to figure out who they are and what’s going on.
Notable for: instead of rolling dice, you play blackjack with tarot cards; the position of GM rotates every act so even the GM won’t know everything that’s going on (unless they read ahead where they’re told not to); you gain skills with flashbacks to your former life where you remember a little bit about who you are; you play blackjack with tarot cards
Guys did I ever tell you about the time I completely accidentally ruined a professionally made campaign for Dungeons and Dragons thanks to a single roll
Please explain
Ok so we had to fight our way to the bottom of a castle to stop a group of cultists from summoning an Orc god to the world and we got there and the ritual was already going so I ran up to the god, who had already begun to manifest, and cast Finger of Death, which kills any target I touch if they fail a Fortitude roll. Since he was a god, he had a good constitution and would have certainly survived
The oath of the commons is sworn by those who defend communities and the natural resources they rely on. They provide not only a good sword arm, but counsel and teachings on how to properly manage and maintain the environment around them. These paladins are rarely alone, understanding that the good fight must be taken with your fellows side by side. Although some worship nature, most just understand it’s important to a healthy life and people.
Tenets of the Commons
Give As You Take.There is no shame in needing aid from others, however try to give as much and more back to world, to both nature and people alike. Know Your Limits.Understand that there must be limits to the harvest and limits to your power, and be careful to stay within them. Fair Governance.When a choice affects a community, all have equal right to speak their mind and decide the fate of their actions, within reason. Respect All Things.If one does not respect the existence and harmony of others, they must face consequences, less they bring ruin to all.
Oath Spells
Level Spells 3rd Purify Food and Drink, Sanctuary 5th Enhance Ability, Locate Animals or Plants 9th Create Food and Water, Beacon of Hope 13th Fabricate, Guardian of Nature 17th Commune with Nature, Wrath of Nature
Channel Divinity
One For All.As an action, you call upon the energy of the surrounding environment and community, and give it back two-fold. Choose an amount of creatures up to your Charisma modifier, excluding yourself, and their actions will be considered aided by the Help action. This lasts for 1 minute. Plentiful Bounty.The world has room for all, and the good earth is rich and can provide for everyone. As an action, you can remove a number of exhaustion levels equal to your proficiency bonus. It also removes the poisoned condition and gives temporary hit points equal to your paladin level.
Aura of Community
Beginning at 7th Level, you and all allies within 10 feet of you share one buff spell/power that was given to you by something other than you. You can switch out whatever buff you wish to share as a bonus action. What constitutes as a ‘buff’ spell/power/condition is up to DM discretion. At 18th level, the range increases to 30 feet.
Natural Spirit
Starting at 15th level, your soul has melded with the natural energies and systems around you. You can choose to be resistant to one of these damage types; Fire, Cold, Lightning, or Thunder. You can switch out which one you are resistant to after a long rest.
One With The People
At 20th level, you are a representative of your community and find strength through them and the land you come from. Using your action, you undergo a transformation, pulling the elements to your body and filling yourself with the mystical energy of all those around you.
For 1 minute, you gain the following benefits:
You gain resistance to Fire, Cold, Lightning and Thunder.
You can give one of these resistances to everyone in a 30 foot radius.
You and all your allies within a 10 foot radius receive a bonus to AC equal to the number of people within that radius. This includes yourself.
Snark about crit fail perception checks, e.g. “I go into the cave” “Roll a perception check” “Nat 1” “You suspect you may be in a cave”
“Are you sure you want to do that?”
The eyebrow raise and weary “Okay” when they say yes
The constant battle to stop your players from flirting with every NPC
The constant battle with that one player who thinks all the monsters are REALLY hot
“You can certainly try!”
The weary sigh and scramble to come up with stats when they initiate combat in a moment that was supposed to be completely calm
The utter shock and secret pride when they solve what was supposed to be a combat situation completely nonviolentlently
The utter fucking DELIGHT of writing a moment that lands really well and that the players all love
That moment of sheer panic and desperate scrambling when they do the one fucking thing you didn’t plan for
Just, when you’re in the middle of a session and you look around and realize everyone is really into it and all these people you care about are having a really really good time because of something you organized and your heart swells a little
My DM has mentioned the possibility of my character’s death as a few too many NPC’s who can see the future so I’m worried that he might kill him off. So just in case he does and I’m not happy with it, I have some truly awful backup characters to pull out such as:
A half-orc barbarian who’s just Shrek
A Kenku that only communicates via a Duke Nukem soundboard
Paul of House Blart, Paladin of Ma’all, God of Justice and Mercantile
A gnome bard who exclusively plays Crazy Frog songs
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