delilahbriarwood:

delilahbriarwood:

D&D Update:

My mother literally stabbed our table to make her Intimidation check against the Arl.

Update 2 because everyone keeps asking:

Yes, she got advantage instantly.

Yes, she passed with a total of 22 against the Arl’s natural 1.

missharpersworld:

cloudfreed:

helloitsbees:

earlhamclassics:

thoodleoo:

thoodleoo:

there’s a lot of evidence that the iliad and the odyssey were actually composed by a variety of poets through an oral tradition rather than just by one poet, so what if the homeric texts are actually just a very long game of D&D

homer, the dm: okay achilles, agamemnon has just taken away your war prize, what do you want to do
achilles’ player: i roll to have a diplomatic conversation with agamemnon
achilles’ player: *rolls a 1*
homer: you throw the staff of speaking at agamemnon’s face and storm off to sulk with your boyfriend

Homer, the DM: Your beautiful Patroclus is dead. What do you do?
Achilles’ player: I fight everyone.
Homer, the DM: You can’t fight everyone. How would you even–
Achilles’ player: *rolls a 20* I fight everyone.
Homer, the DM: *sighs* Fine. You cut a path through the Trojan army, enemy dead strewn in your wake.
Achilles’ player: How many?
Homer, the DM: …lots. Enough to clog the friggin’ river with bodies.
Achilles’ player: I fight the river.
Homer, the DM: You. can. not. fight. the. river.
Achilles’ player: *reaches for dice*

Homer, the DM: Okay guys, so the war’s over, you had a bunch of losses but you won in the end. Time to go home, let’s roll to see who gets there firs—

Odysseus’s player: I got a critical failure.

Homer: The cyclops asks you who you are. What do you do?

Odysseus’s player: I say, “Who me? I’m nobody.”

Homer: Roll for deception.

Odysseus’s player: I got a natural 20.

Homer: The cyclops now completely believes that your name is Nobody. He shouts for help from the other cyclops but they ignore him because he’s telling them that “Nobody hurt him.”

Odysseus’s player:
FUCK yes

for those who love D&D and the classics !!

outofcontextdnd:

Druid: My name is Erik with a k.

NPC: *writes name down* And your last name?

Druid: With a k.

NPC: No I got that: Erik. What’s your last name?

Druid: My last name is with a k.

NPC: Wait…is your name Erik Erik?

Druid: My last name is With a K.

NPC:  Okay wait a minute, so to clarify –

Druid: My last name is literally the phrase *air quotes* “Withakay.” It is all one word.

NPC: *finishes writing* So review the document to make sure I got this right.

Druid: *looks* No I spell Eric with a C

probably-really-bad-item-ideas:

iguanamouth:

why even stop there lets keep this awful finger train goin

Item Idea #22

A quiver full of arrows, but instead of arrowheads, they have hands. These instead deal bludgeoning damage instead of piercing, and on a critical, you pinch a nerve, and deal 2x damage.

universejunction:

Scott “The Angry GM” Rehm espouses wisdom weekly on how to run tabletop roleplaying games. D&D in particular, but most of his advice applies generally. I want to start running D&D games again, and I be very good at what I do. So, for my own assistance, and here for anyone else who might like it, is an index / introduction to The Angry GM’s articles, organized in a way useful to me. Maybe it’ll be useful to you too.

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Running Games

The very basics

• Using a skill system
• Adjudicating Actions
• Narration
• Social interaction
• Improvisation
  • Improvising rules
  • Improvising story

Important skills

• Pacing
• Running your first session
• Session structure
  • Recapping
• Non-player characters
  • NPCs in the party
  • Questgivers
  • Unexpected NPCs
• Opportunity costs and trade-offs
• Dealing with death
• Your Game Mastering credo
• Different kinds of fun
  • Engagement
• Adopting a new group
• Published modules (when I won a prize for being “the least worst person ever to Ask Angry Anything!”)
• Planning and preperation
• Tone and what’s possible
• Atmosphere
• Creativity exercises

Campaigns

• Plot Arcs
• Starting a campaign

Adventures

• Exploration lessons from Metroid
• Adventure basics
• Structure
• Resolution
• Motivation
• Backstory
• Challenge and difficulty
• Three types of structures
  • Linear
  • Open
  • Branching
• More on sandbox games
• Coming up with ideas
• Mystery stories
• Making wilderness travel matter
• A fragile premise
• Rest in regard to adventuring days
• Faction powers and planning

Scenes

• Types of scenes
  • Opening scenes
  • Exposition and exploration
• Who, what, when, where, and why
• Building scenes

Encounters

• What makes an encounter
• Building encounters
• Traps
• Interaction in encounters

Combat

• Combat basics
• Enemy combatants
• Battlefields
• Building combats
• Managing combats

Building the Megadungeon

• Intro
• Adventuring days
• Awarding Experience Points
• The critical path
• Gating
• Backstory
• Plot and story beats
• The master plan – math
• The master plan – plot
• Flowchart
• Mapping encounters
• Trashing work
• A map
• Map tour part 1
• Map tour part 2
• Design philosophy
• Asset libraries
• Random encounters
• Reward and punishments
• Map rules

Other interesting thoughts

• Defining roleplaying
• The Metagame
  • It’s your fault
• When you can’t lie
• Experience points and rewards
• GMs and players are playing different games
• Passive and active skills
• Abbreviating stat blocks for D&D 5e
• Alignment
• City mapping
• How to publish D&D content
• Reflecting on D&D 4e
• Probability
• Slow decisions
• What’s a class good for? (Which might suggest you could change what classes are available for world building / tone purposes)
• Running a game for an evil party
• The non-problem of comfort zone / Too much loot
• PC conflict
  • That guy who loves to annoy the party
• Alignment again / Encounter balance in 5e
• Try to make Intelligence and Charisma not terrible
• Psionics (and tone)
• Critical hits
• Damage rolls

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If you like this, consider supporting his Patreon (I do, but only a little). I’m not affiliated with The Angry GM, just a fan.

Scott, if you happen to read this, thanks for all you do!