Tag: ailís

wizardshark:

scribefindegil:

my favorite part of d&d is when someone is like “… I think I know what my character would do … but it might get us into more trouble …” and everyone else starts chorusing “FOLLOW THEIR HEART!!” as we collectively tumble further and further into narratively fulfilling disaster

And the opposite, “I want to do it but my character wouldn’t” and everyone starts chanting “META GAME. META GAME”

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

tom-nippleston:

The people in the apartment below me are playing “Never Have I Ever” and I’m smoking on my porch creeping on their game

Guy 1: Never have I ever INTIONALLY walked in on my parents having sex
Gal 1: fuck you brandon! It wasn’t intentional! I didn’t know what they were doing!!!
Brandon (Guy 1): Shut up Katy no one is THAT oblivious take your drink

Katy: Never have I ever LOST a wet tshirt contest

(Good job Katy. You do you. Proud of you boo)

Gal 2: Never have I ever pierced my genitals
Brandon: IT WAS IN FOR LIKE A MONTH!
Katy: Whatever bitch, take a drink you Prince Albert having douche
Brandon: I’m being singled out I hate you all

Guy 2: Never have I ever had a threescore
[Pause]
Guy 2: WHAT THE FUCK KATY?!?!?!?!
Katy: Shut up Andrew it’s before we even knew each other this was years ago!!!
[Pause]
Andrew: And you won’t even watch porn with me…

(the family is disintegrating)

Brandon: Never have I ever been in such a confrontational game of Never Have I Ever….

[People saying ‘cheers’]

(stop fighting guys you’re tearing this family apart…..)

Andrew: Never have I ever had sex WITH a piece of food.
[Pause]
Andrew: Dude
Brandon: Dude
Katy: Dude omg
Gal 2: what? Omg EVERY girl has practiced giving head with a banana!
Katy: Um no Ester. SOME of us just practice on dicks.
Ester: what the fuck though. Whatever.

(Don’t let them kink shame you Ester I still love you)

#TeamEster
#BananaSplits

Andrew is testing a banana. Go for it andrew. Explore your wild side
#TeamEster #TeamKink

Brandon: Never have I ever been called a fuckboy
Katy and Andrew: TO YOUR FACE
Brandon: Go fuck a banana Andrew

#TeamBananaFucking

Ester: Never have I ever had a crush on a family member
Brandon: [random fumbling noises]
Katy: brandon omg ew
Andrew: yeah man come the fuck on wtf man its 2016
Brandon: SHE WAS MY COUSIN AND I WAS 13 IT’S NOT LIKE SHE WAS MY SISTER AND IT WAS JUST A CRUSH NOTHING HAPPENED
Ester: methinks thou dost protest too fucking much
Brandon: NEVER TELLING YOU SHIT AGAIN
Andrew: Chug your drink, Sir IncestsALot
Brandon: Chug a fucking banana Andrew

#TeamBananaFucking #TeamWhatTheFuckBrandon

Katy and Andrew have gone home in an Uber to apparently sex it up. Alway use a designated driver, kids. And always put protection on your Banana.

#BananaCreamPie
#GamesOverKids
#TeamEster

teashoppes:

some agents of chaos i’ve gone to summer camp with:

  • a girl who, every day, would choose a random person to follow around and sing the entirety of “hollaback girl” at
  • a girl who sprayed half a can of axe directly up her nose because she was bored (and would have sprayed the entire can had she not passed out)
  • a boy who stole a counselor’s frappuccino and drank the whole thing in one long sip because she said kids shouldn’t have coffee
  • a girl whose lunch was always three whole vegetables that she would eat like apples no matter what the vegetables were
  • a boy who refused to answer to anything other than “parcheesi” for a solid five weeks