OH I FORGOT. I SAW THE GREATEST CAR IN THE WORLD WHEN I WAS COMING BACK FROM THE JOB INTERVIEW I DID TODAY
I got the job I had interviewed for in this post and they started me at $13/hr and a guaranteed 20 hours a week thanks everyone for their support in the notes abt the job interview itself and no thanks to the people who said it was cursed
Reblog the X3 HEWWO car of career success. Reblog for a decent job
flower urchins are such fanciful magical looking animals and the most whimsical part of all has to be the part where if you touch those pretty little cups you die horribly
Really though what fucker even programmed the ocean
Rarely attacks in open water unless provoked, more interested in other NPC creatures
No interest in attacking player character, rarely even encountered
Zero combat capability
Befriendable
Befriendable
ONE HIT PERMADEATH
the ocean meta was not designed with the terrestrial players in mind
I just had this hyper-realistic dream and like. I don’t even know what to make of this lmao
I was sitting in this park, on a bench, looking up at the night sky and all the stars and stuff, and I blinked and suddenly the entire sky was different. I’m talking different constellations, the sky absolutely packed with billions more stars, some so close they’re massive. I’m like wtf and suddenly I realise there’s an old man sitting next to me, dressed in like 1940s clothing, also looking up at the sky.
before I can ask him if he’s you know, noticed, he speaks, without looking away from the sky.
“this is what the universe really looks like,” he tells me.
“oh,” I say. a pause. “…can you put it back?”
he smiles and nods. I look up. the sky has gone back to normal.
“what do I do with this information?” I ask, looking at him again.
he turns his head and, smiling, looks me dead in the face. "be careful.“
one of my coworkers has a matching tat w her fiance. hers says “beauty” in cursive and his says “beast” in like an edgy Masculine font & that’s what straight culture is
it’s with a heavy heart that i must announce…. they broke up and now they have this goofy shit on their bodies forever
“okay, start recording” “can i help the next guest please? uh, hello, sir, welcome to starbucks, what can i get for you?” “Y̵̛͜͢E̷A̴̡͘͝H̢͘̕ ̶̵̢̢͠Ç̶҉͠A̧͞N̕͡ ͜͟I̶̢͠ ̸͘G͟͝È̴̡͟T̨̛͠҉̛ ̀͘A͢͞ ̴̵M̴̴̢̀Ò͜͝Ţ̨͏̨H̷́É̡͜͠Ŕ̷F̡̧̧̛U҉͟͜C̢̡͏̸̢K̸͘͡͝Í̵Ń̢͡҉G̶̕͡ ̷̶̷҉U͜H́̕͢H̷̢̨̛H̢̨͏H̴̛͡҉Ḩ͡H͞͞-͞͏̕” [mic cuts off] “ḨH̨̛͠͝Ḩ͜͢͜H͏҉͜͝H̵̴̀҉H̡̛̀H̀҉̨͞H̶̕͢͠H̷̡̀͢H̡́͜͠H̸̨̧͜H͠҉H̕̕H̛̀̀͝H̀́͠H̵̢̨̀͢H̢̨͢H̢͘H̴̶̛H̸͝͠͠H҉̕H҉̢͜͠H̵̴H̕͢͠H̢͘͝͞H̸̕͟͡H̶̛͘H̶̡͜͟͡H҉҉͏̷H̷̡͢͠͝H̷̡͘H̶̴͝͏H̴͘H͜͡H̨҉̨̕͝H̀͠H̛͟H҉̴͟͠H̡͘͢H̴̛͢͠H̵́͞͠H̴̀H̸͟͡͡H̨̨͢͟H͠͏H͞͞H̢̨͘͞͠H̡͞H̨́̕͜H̨̡̨҉H̸͘͞͠H̶͢͟H҉̛͡҉H̨̕B̶̢̛͠͠U̢̨͜R̢͟͡͡҉G̡̨͝E̛͟͠R̸̵̛” [laughter] “sir, we don’t sell burgers here.” “Ẁ̡̛͠H͘҉͏͏͞A̶͜T̢̢̡̀͢ ̡͢D͏̛͞O҉ ̶͘͠Y҉̢̨̕͜Ó͠͠U̢̧͜ ҉̢̛͢͠M͏̷̀Ȩ́̀͡ĄŅ̸̢͜ ͢͟͡҉͏Y̵̶͜͢O̴͡Ư ̸͟͞͠D̢̕͝͠O̡͡͠͞Ņ̀͡T͘͢ ͜͢S͡È͡҉-̧͠” [mic cuts off again] “we sell- we sell paninis and breakfast sandwiches.” “OH MY CARDIAC ARREST” “Y͏͏̀O҉̸̀U̧͢͟ ̵̢̨͜͢T̵̛̛H̸҉̧I̵̢N҉̶̕͟K̵҉ ́͘҉҉I̶͏̴ ́҉K҉̴͡N̡̡̛O͢Ẁ͜͡͝ ͢W͘҉͟H̶̴́͢͢À͝T͜͟ ̷̨͘A̕ ͏̡͟͡P̨̕҉̶̡Á̡҉N̸͝͡Í̸̡͠N҉҉͟͢͞Ì̧͢ ̶̡̢͘͡Í́͟͜S̢͞ l̶͏̀̕ļ͏̶l̶̨̛͡҉l͘̕͞͠l̷̡͞l̡͟l̸̨̕͡ĺ̢͠l̸̛͜l̀̀̕͠ĺ͏̛͟ļ̶̶̛͜l̀͘̕͢l̶̨l͟ļ̸̨l̵̨̧l҉҉͞ļ̵̕l̴̶l̷͠͠͞l̸̨̡̀͢l̷͘͢͞” [even more laughter] “J̶̨̧̧U͟͢S͏̛̕̕͝Ţ̶ ̴̶̷̛͘G̢͝Í̵̢M̷͢͟͠M̸̀͘͢E̛͠ ̸̡A̵̡͞͞͞ ̸̸̸B̛͝U҉̨̛͞R̨̀Ģ͟É͢͡R̶̷͟ ̧̨̕͟E͝͝͏͞X̵̀͢T̵͘R̀́͢͞Á̧́͞҉ ̷͜͟C͢͡H͏̶͏̢E̡͘͢͞͡E͢͏̶́̕S̶͡É̸͟͢҉ ҉̨͡l҉͜͠͏l͝͝͡͏͡l҉̸̧͜l̷̴̷͝l̨̛͢͠l̸̷͡ĺ̡̛ļ̸͜l̷̵̛͜͝l̡͘̕l͢҉̡ĺ͡l̷̛ĺ͏͏l̵̴̨͘͠l̸̡͜͜” “no, we don’t have burger extra cheese, we have paninis and b-” “D̵̨͜͞҉-̢͡͠ ͠҉N̷͝Ơ̧͝ ̶͘Y͢҉̢͞O͏̡̧́U҉̨ ̢̡D̷̸̡̛Ò̀͠N͢Ţ̵̷͘͟ ̕͏U҉̛Ņ̴̷̷͡D̨̀͞͡Ę̴̕R͢͝͠S̀͠Ţ̶͘A̴͜N̛͞D͜͟ ̸̨͢҉I̵̧͘̕ ̸̕̕N̴̨͢͜E̡E̢͢D͏̸͜͞͠ ҉̷T͟H͟͠Í̧̢̡͜S҉͏ ̶͢͜͡l̨̕͡l̷̛̕͝ļ̵̧͢͟l̵̢̕͢ĺ̴̵͝͠l̵͜͟͝͝ĺ̷̶ļ̵̡̡͜ĺ͠l̢͡͠ĺ̶l̸̴l̸͝l̡͘͟͏͠l̷҉͘l̡̢̕͞l̵͜͝l̶̢̢̢͢l̨̢͞l̸̴͟ļ̸l̶̡͘͠” “NO” “sir, i’m gonna have to ask you to get out if you dont want anything” (transcribed to best ability) [discord noise] “W͢͢҉̴H͏̨͠͞Y҉̵͜ ̶̛À̷̧͡͞R̵̡͝È̢ ̷̨̀͝Y̷̸̶̴O͏̨̛͡Ú̶̢̨͘ ̶̴́͘̕K̕͠Ę̸̸̕͢Ȩ͟͠P̨͟҉Į̸̀̕̕N͟͡҉G̷̛͞͝͏ ̨̢̧͜͟T͟H͜͡͠I̵͏͠͝Ş͘͟͏̡ ̡A̸͢ ̶͡S̸͝҉̷͡E̡͏̸̧C҉́R̛̀E̛͜͝T̛͘͏͠ ̷̷̛͠͡F̴́R҉̨̀́͘Ơ̵̴͘͢M̡̧̛̕͠ ̷T̵H̷͏̴͝Ę̸̴͝ ̵͠͠P̸̴̧̀Ú͝͝҉͟B̸̴̀L̢̀͘͢I̴̛Ç̴̸͜” “what, in the hell did i walk into” [more laughter and people dying] “WHAT HAPPENED, HOLD ON, HOLD ON” “can i get you a caramel macchiato?” “-̷̧͠-̧́͘B̴̴̀E̸̵͏ ̛̕I̷̷̶̴͘ ̸̶̢́͟H̶A̶̢̕͢͢V̴͘E͢͡ ̶̶͜A̢͜ ̶̡́͢B̶̨̕͜U̕͠͠R̨̛̀͠Ģ̵̶͜E̶̷R̀̕ ̀͜E̵̷̵X̨͢͝T̴̢̧̀͞R̶̨̨̡A҉̷̕͏̶ ̶̸D̴͟I̷͢P̷̧̨̀͡D̵̷͘͘T̴̨͡H̀͟ ̶̛͡҉ĺ̵̴̛̀l̨͡͝l̛͜l͜͠l̵̡̡͡͡ĺ̴̴̢̨l̴҉l̨͜͝l̨̡ļ̸̡̧͜l͝͝l̡͟l҉̧̕l̷̢l̵̡l̨̕l̀͢͡l̷̶̀l̨̡͠l҉̕͘͘͢l̛͘͠͡ĺ̨̨͡͡l̴̕͟ļ̴̛̀͜l҉̶̡͘͠l̕͟͠͡l̨̛̀͠҉l̕͘̕͝͠ļ̡̡̛͞” “WE DONT HAVE ONE-” “OH MY GOD THE VOICE CHANGER REALLY” [insert big smoke’s order] “SIR, THIS IS A STARBUCKS, NOT A MCDONALDS-” “D̴̨҉̷U̴̶͏D̀̀͘͟È ̴̧͘͢Ỳ̸̸͝͡O͜͡Ų͏҉́ ̵̡͘͘T̨͞Ò͟O̶͘͝K҉̸̵͘͜ ̨́͡͠M̴̨̨͏Ỳ̷̶̕͞ ̀́M̶̷̛͘̕O̡̧Ņ̴E͏̵́͢͢Y̴̛̕͟͡ ́́I̸͢͡F͢͠͏ ̕I̷̴̡ ̧̛́͠͠D̨̕͠O̧͝N̨̕T͝҉ ̡̨̀҉Ģ̶I͢͡҉̴V̡̧͡E̡͘ ̀͢͡Ỳ̴O̕͡҉Ú̶͠ ̴̴̨͜͡M҉̵̴͝O҉N̷̴̡҉͜E̕͜Y͏̸̕͞ “ [people are dying, gerald] “SIR, YOU ARE AT THE WRONG STORE! YOU WANT THE MCDONALDS, NOT THE STARBUCKS…” ”WHY ARE YOU BUYING CLOTHES AT THE SOUPS STORE?” “H͠͠҉Ę̴̷̨̛L͘L҉̵̧͢Ò̴̸” [even MORE laughter] “I̷̡͢҉̢ ̵̴̡̀͝W̨͜͡Ǫ̨Ú̶̢͢͝L̴̡̨͢͝D̴̨̡̢͡ ̵͢͡͝͏L̷̕̕͟͡I̶̡҉K҉̀Ę͘͠ ͟͏̸̡͘Á͜͞ ́҉̴͢͞B͜͏Ų̵̡̢Ŗ̛G̴̢̛̛E̢̡̨͘͠R̨̨͘ ̧͠l̷̡̀͘l̶̡͞l̸̵͘͢l͘͢l̶̕l̢͘͝l҉̴̛͢l̷̶̡͢l̨͡҉l̸̸̡̕͢l̨̡l͏l҉̴̧l̴͟ĺ̷̢͘l̴̵̛l҉̸l҉̸҉̕ĺ͟l̷̨͞͝͡l̶͝l͠͏͟l̴̀l̶͢l̵̛“ “NO” “holy goooooooooooood” “NO, WE SERVE COFFEE AND, DUTCH DANISHES HERE, JESUS CHRIST!” (transcribed to best ability again) “BOSS? UH, GH, E- I NEED TO GET THE MANAGER” “smiley how much of that did you get?” [echoing] “Ｃ Ｏ Ｍ Ｐ Ｏ Ｕ Ｎ Ｄ” “WHAT?” “sir, do you want to- do you want to speak to the manager?” “he’s ordering from the ether” “he’s ordering a burger-” “Ý͡E̢͟A͏H͘͏̶̴ ̵̶́̕͢C͘A̧͘N̵͟ ̀̀͢͞Í̵ ͏̕G̛͘E̵̛̕͞T̡͡͠͏ ͡҉̡͘͢Ą̸͘ ̸͜F̴̡Ų̷̷̢C҉̷̴̸Ķ͡Į͘N͟͠Ǵ͝҉̷͏ ̶̡U͞H́͜H͜͟͝H͘H̷̨͜͞͡H̢̧́͘Ḩ́͡H̶H̴͠͠“ “NO!” “oh my god” “he’s ordering- he’s trying to order a burger with-” “okay” “-extra, starbucks” [laughter, keyboards] “this s- uh, this discord is wild, wild, [unintelligble]” “it just got a lot hotter in this room” “god, that’s what it’s like working at there, ‘cause i’m like, “hey, what can i get you?” and the person is like, “can i get a fucking uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh coffee.” it’s like “okay, what kind of coffee?” “uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…” and then they order like five different things in a cup and then im there just like-”
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