andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

Here in the Portland airport, one grey haired butch lesbian in a cap approaches another in a cowboy hat and asks, “How many short sleeves button downs do you own?” To which the cowboy hat butch replies, “I don’t know, I’ve never taken inventory. Definitely more than 15.”

“More than fifteen,” the first one said wistfully.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” I added at this point, thirsty to the point of dehydrating to death, “but I would like to request you adopt me into some kind of slightly sexual apprenticeship situation.”

That last paragraph is obvious a joke, I instead choked on my tongue and died as they discussed tailoring their own button up shirts.

THEY ARE SEATED BEHIND ME MAYDAY MAYDAY

I said nothing to them like a true coward but I did overhear them talk about a female neighbor who flirted for months with another woman without the woman ever noticing, so I clearly missed an opportunity to turn around and ask “so at what point do we as Queer Lasses learn how to fucking take a hint”